This Love
by ninjanervana
Summary: Zutara song fic based off of Taylor Swift's This Love. I don't own the characters or the song. Reviews are greatly appreciated!


Hey readers, I think writing Zutara stories may become my new obsession. Hope you all enjoy and feel free to leave me a review or let me know if there's a song you'd like me to write a story to or even just a general story idea

-Ninjanervana

* * *

 _Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in_

 _And I could go on and on, on and on, and I will_

 _Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again_

 _And you were just gone and gone, gone and gone_

Zuko stood on the edge of the dock with Katara, paying no mind to the hustle and bustle of people around them, the citizens who gawked at the newly crowned Fire Lord and the master waterbender who saved his life. The setting sun lit the sky ablaze with reds and oranges, reflecting brightly off the water's surface. Now that the war was over, the port was in a constant state of activity, with Fire Nation troops coming home at long last, with trade goods flowing in and out. Captains shouted orders to sailors on decks as passengers hurried to say their good-byes and board their departing ships. Life was changing, changing rapidly, but the Fire Nation citizens were quickly adapting to it as best as they could. A hundred years of fighting couldn't be forgotten overnight, but they had to try their best to make amends and move forward. It was time for everyone to return back home and rebuild again.

As he stared up at the massive ship docked in front of him, Zuko's heart felt like a lead weight in his chest. Never in his life had he wished to control another element -fire was in his heart and soul- but at that moment, he wanted nothing more than to be a waterbender. To be able to draw the tide in and never release it again, never let it draw her away from him. The war had brought them together; he never thought the end of it would pull them apart. The thought of letting her go, of not having her with him, made his chest tighten, reminding him of the pain filled days after he took Azula's lightning to his chest.

His hand reached for hers, their fingers interlacing effortlessly, as if he could anchor her to his side. "Katara," he murmured as he turned toward her, the last rays of the setting sun making her brown skin glow and clear blue eyes shine. His words died on his lips as he gazed at her, trying to memorize her face. It would be a long time before he saw her again; he didn't want to forget a single detail about her. She was already seared into his heart and soul, but he wouldn't pass up one last opportunity to look at her. Who knew when the next chance would be.

"You're staring, Zuko," Katara commented after a minute, a sad smile tugging at her lips. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?" he questioned, squeezing her hand gently as he took a step closer to her, only a few inches of space between their chests.

"Like you'll never see me again."

 _In silent screams,_

 _In wildest dreams_

 _I never dreamed of this_

 _This love is good, this love is bad_

 _This love is alive back from the dead_

 _These hands had to let it go free_

 _And this love came back to me_

"Katara, we have to go or we'll lose the tide," Hakoda called to her as he stood by the ramp that led to the upper deck of the ship. Zuko had given them half of the Fire Nation's southern fleet to help the Southern Water Tribe rebuild. And hopefully to bring her back to him.

"I'm coming," Katara shouted over her shoulder, her voice catching as she turned back to face Zuko. Her blue eyes welled up with tears as they met his golden ones, the frown on her lips deepening as her bottom lip quivered.

Zuko cupped her cheeks lightly, leaning his forehead against hers. He knew he had to be strong for her, for them. He couldn't ask her to stay, couldn't ask her to separate herself from her family for his sake. She'd already spent so much time away from her father, her grandmother. He couldn't ask her for more. He loved her with every part of his soul and he knew he had to do what was right for her, even if he felt like he was dying. He needed her to be happy. "It's okay," he rasped as a tear escaped her eye, his thumb gently brushing it away. "It's alright."

"No, it's not," Katara retorted with a sniffle, trying to hold back her tears. "None of this is right."

"Being with your family is right," Zuko disagreed gently. "They're important to you."

"So are you," she replied, her hands wrapping around his wrists.

A sad smile graced his lips as he kissed her forehead, breathing in her scent. "I don't know what I'm gonna do without you," he murmured, pulling her into a hug.

Katara's arms wrapped around him tightly as her slender frame trembled. "Don't overwork yourself," she mumbled against his chest. "Don't pick at your scar. Eat regular meals and don't let those pompous aristocrats work you up. Follow your heart when you rule. Drink your uncle's tea and ask for help when you need it. Write me. Promise you'll write me."

"I'll write you every chance I get," Zuko promised, trying to swallow past the lump in his throat. Agni, this was so much worse than he had ever dreamed. "You'll get sick of my letters."

Katara pulled back to look up at him, tears glistening on her cheeks. "I'm going to come back, alright? I'm coming back."

"I'll be here waiting for you," Zuko whispered, afraid his voice would break if he spoke any louder, that she'd hear the pain and heartbreak in the sound.

Tears continued running down Katara's cheeks as she looked up at him, her bottom lip trembling more. "Good-bye, Zuko," she whispered, kissing him passionately, briefly, before pulling away with a choked sob.

"Good-bye, Katara," he whispered, her quiet, rapid footsteps across the dock sounding like the shattering of his heart.

 _Tossing, turning, struggled through the night with someone new_

 _And I could go on and on, on and on_

 _Lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you_

 _But you're still gone, gone, gone_

Katara stared up at the ceiling, sighing softly. She had been back at the Southern Water Tribe for nearly two weeks and while she expected to feel a little different after being away from home for so long, she hadn't expected to feel like a total stranger in the land she grew up in. Gran Gran and the others were excited to see her, Sokka, and her father, eager to hear of their adventures with Aang and their defeat of Ozai, but recounting their tales just made her feel more and more out of place. Gone was the simple waterbender girl who couldn't even catch a fish with her bending, who left with her older brother to help Aang. Now she was the master waterbender who trained the Avatar and defeated the crazed Fire Princess Azula. She couldn't help feeling the person she had become didn't belong in the South Pole anymore.

With a frustrated groan, she rolled onto her side, her eyes catching sight of the small candle she kept lit on her nightstand. She could hear Gran Gran snoring in the room next to hers; things had been much quieter when she stayed in the room next to Zuko's in the Fire Nation. A small smile graced her lips as she stared at the flame flickering in the dark, a quiet warmth filling her chest. Katara couldn't help thinking of a certain fire bender every time her eyes caught sight of a flame, couldn't help wondering how he was. Was he taking care of himself? Was he doing okay ruling? Was his scar causing him any pain? Would anyone try to rebel against him? Thoughts of Zuko ran circles in her mind, often leaving her in a daze during the day. More than once Sokka had commented on her distraction, asking if she was okay. She wasn't sure she was.

 _Been losing grip,_

 _On sinking ships_

 _You showed up just in time_

 _This love is good, this love is bad_

 _This love is alive back from the dead_

 _These hands had to let it go free_

 _And this love came back to me_

After a month, Zuko's first letter arrived at the South Pole, bringing with it the first deep breath Katara had taken since she left the Fire Nation. As the days went by with no word from him, she had grown more and more worried. What if something had happened to him? How would she know? Would anyone send word to her? What if she couldn't get to him in time? She'd spent nearly every day torn between happiness at being back home and sadness for leaving Zuko behind.

When she finally decided to return to the Fire Nation to see him and ease her fears, Sokka handed her a letter, fresh from a Fire Nation ship docked outside the village. The sight of his familiar handwriting on the pages brought tears to her eyes. His letter was four pages long, filled with all manner of information, often bouncing from one topic to the next as he rushed to get his thoughts out. Katara was relieved to know he was doing okay, but her heart still ached from the separation. It was right to go back home, to be with her people, -she had to go- but that didn't stop her heart from breaking every day.

 _This love left a permanent mark_

 _This love is glowing in the dark_

 _These hands had to let it go free_

 _And this love came back to me_

 _This love, this love, this love, this love..._ _[4x]_

 _'Shhh, it's alright, Zuko,' Katara crooned, her water-covered hands brushing lightly against the wound on his chest. It had only been a few hours since the Agni Kai had ended, since she had chained the crazed Fire Princess and revived Zuko under the blood red sky. Every available second Katara had was spent at Zuko's side, her hands gloved in water as she tried to heal the immense damage to his chest. 'I'm here; it's alright.'_

 _'Agni, it hurts,' Zuko groaned, his hands fisting his bed sheets beside him as he struggled to keep still under Katara's touch. He could barely stand the brush of his shirt against the scar, the light touch making the skin ache. Zuko knew she was only trying to help, that she would heal him as much as she could, but Spirits, her touch made him feel as if his chest was being ripped open._

 _He sighed in relief as her hands finally retreated, his body going limp against the sheets. 'Sorry I'm not a better patient,' he murmured as he looked up at her, tired golden eyes meeting equally tired blue eyes._

 _Katara shook her head, brushing a lock of sweat-soaked hair from his forehead. 'Don't be,' she answered easily as she sat on the bed beside him. 'You're in pain; I can only imagine how much this wound hurts. It's gonna take a lot of healing.' Zuko's expression soured at her words, making Katara laugh. 'Don't worry, I'll be by your side for everything.'_

 _'I was hoping you'd say that,' he rasped, his heartbeat quickening as he took her hand in his. He was quiet for a moment, watching as Katara laced their fingers together. 'I was really scared for a moment there.'_

 _'That you'd die?'_

 _Zuko shook his head, his eyes rising to meet hers. 'That I wouldn't be able to get to you in time. That I wouldn't be able to stop Azula's lightning.'_

 _Katara blushed brightly, her blue eyes widening in surprise. 'Zuko, what are-'_

 _'I've been scared of a lot of things in my life, Katara,' he said, slowly pushing himself upright, never releasing her hand. 'Some things with good reason, some things stupidly. But I've never-' Zuko paused, clearing his throat to get past the sudden lump that had formed. 'I've never been as scared as I was watching that lightning heading toward you. I can handle a lot of things, Katara. But I absolutely_ _ **cannot**_ _handle losing you. I couldn't survive that.'_

 _'I'm not going anywhere,' Katara whispered, her ocean blue eyes soft with understanding and maybe, just maybe, a bit of love._

 _Summoning all of his bravery, he leaned into her, his lips pressing into hers chastely as he raised a hand to the back of her head._

Zuko woke with a jerk and a gasp, temporarily disoriented by the darkness. Gone was the sunset filled room of his memory, replaced with the darkness of his bedroom. Even though it had been months ago, he could still feel the warmth of Katara sitting beside him on the bed, the smell of the ocean and sweat and smoke in his lungs, the soft brush of her lips against hers. Katara haunted all of his waking thoughts; it was only fitting that she'd haunt his sleeping ones as well.

He rested his hand on his chest, covering the scar that no longer pained him thanks to her healing. He knew he'd done the right thing by letting her go, letting her go back to his family, to her tribe. But Agni, being separated from her hurt worse than one hundred of Azula's lightning strikes to his chest. "I had to let her go," he murmured to himself, closing his eyes. "I had to let her go."

 _Your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave_

 _Your smile, my ghost, I fell to my knees_

 _When you're young you just run_

 _But you come back to what you need_

 _This love is good, this love is bad_

 _This love is alive back from the dead_

 _These hands had to let it go free_

 _And this love came back to me_

The monsoons returned to the Fire Nation with vengeance, pouring buckets of water over the capital for days without end. You couldn't step out of a building without being soaked to the skin within minutes. The last time the monsoons had come, before Sozin's comet, the rain had depressed Zuko, the constant downpour seeming like the ceaseless crying of a war-torn world. But now he found the rains to be refreshing, purifying to his country. The Fire Nation was making progress, slow progress, but progress all the same toward repairing their relationships with the other nations. All of the soldiers had returned back to the Fire Nation, trade agreements were tentatively in place with the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribe, and reparation payments were being negotiated. They still had a long road ahead of them, but he was confident his nation was on the right path at last.

Night had firmly settled over the palace, darkness blanketing the grounds, only dispersed by the lanterns hung on the walls and along the stone pathway across the grounds. Zuko had begun taking walks in the evenings after dinner, using the quiet time to digest the events of the day, to process all the information he'd been given during the unending meetings with his advisors. It was one of the few times that he was given peace and quiet, a chance to be just Zuko, not Fire Lord Zuko. He often abandoned his royal robes and crown at these times, preferring to wear the simple Fire Nation clothes he'd worn when they had all stayed on Ember Island. If it wasn't for the scar on his face, he could have passed for one of the palace servants. Tucking his hands into his pockets, his feet followed the familiar nightly path it took around the outer deck of the palace.

 _This love left a permanent mark_

 _This love is glowing in the dark_

 _These hands had to let it go free_

 _And this love came back to me_

Katara stood outside of the palace, drenched in the pouring rain. She always loved the constant warmth of the Fire Nation, but she loved the monsoon season the best out of all the weather. It always snowed in the Water Tribe but she was rarely ever surrounded by her element like she was in the Fire Nation. She closed her eyes, her head tilted back as she basked in her element.

She knew she could have told Zuko she was coming, should have told him she was, but she hadn't planned out her trip that far. A Fire Nation trade ship had been docked on their shores for two weeks, trading supplies with the Water Tribe. She'd spoke to multiple members of the crew, wanting them to feel welcome in a place that was still wary of anyone from the Fire Nation. When they mentioned their first stop back would be the Fire Nation capital, Katara threw her belongings into a bag, kissed her family goodbye and boarded the ship without a second thought. No one thought to stop her or ask what she was doing, but she had a feeling they knew it wouldn't make a difference. Even as they sailed, she knew she could have sent Zuko a messenger hawk, letting him know she was on her way, but she couldn't find the words to put on paper. After so long, she was tired of ink on paper. She wanted to see him, hear him, and she'd settle for nothing less.

Raising her head, she opened her eyes slowly, a soft gasp escaping her lips. She watched as a figure moved along the outer deck of the palace, lost in his thoughts. He was still quite a distance away, but she could recognize him anywhere, his gait, his posture, his body. She had every part of him burned into her mind; she couldn't forget him if she tried. "Zuko," she whispered.

 _This love, this love, this love, this love..._ _[4x]_

Zuko raised his head suddenly, his ears trying to detect what disturbed his thoughts. There was no one out on the deck with him, not with the rain sloshing over the awning and onto the ground, wetting anyone who dared to venture outside. But still he knew he heard something. Glancing around at the torch lit path, he felt his heart stop as his gaze fell onto her. She was half way down the stone pathway, partially blurred by the unending sheets of rain that fell, unmoving under the rainfall. Part of him was sure that he was imagining her, that in a moment or two he'd wake in his office, having fallen asleep while reading the newest round of trade agreements. But he could feel it, feel it in his heart and soul that it was her. "Katara," he whispered, a smile forming on his lips.

Before he consciously thought about it, Zuko had leapt down the front steps, his feet pounding against the stones as he ran toward her. "Katara!" he exclaimed, his smile widening as she began to hurry toward him. The two bodies collided half way down the path, their feet nearly sliding out from under them on the wet stones. "You're here," he said incredulously, his hands running over her hair and arms. "You're really here."

Katara nodded, her tears of joy mixing with the rain. "I'm here, I'm back," she answered excitedly, throwing her arms around his neck as she hugged him. "I came back for you."

Zuko hugged her tightly for a moment, relief washing over him as heavily as the falling rain. "Don't leave again," he said as he gazed at her, one hand moving to cup her cheek. "I don't think I'd survive it."

"Never again," she promised, stretching up on her toes to kiss him. "Never again."

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Reviews please!


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